| Sunday, April 16, 2006 |
| 'What a crappy night' or 'Cecilia is feeling sorry for herself again' or 'HAPPY EASTER FOLKS!' |
Good morning and happy Easter people of the blogging world. It is 1.29 am and I have just arrived home from work. I am wearing a yellow chicken in my hair (was truly annoyed that I forgot to take my bunny ears to work - now how often do you get to legitimately wear bunny ears to work?) and making myself feel sick by eating Nutella out of the jar. It's like my hand is linked to my mouth via the spoon in the Nutella jar route, and the part of my brain that connects the sick feelings in my stomach to my hand-spoon-nutella-mouth combination has malfunctioned. Perhaps it's gone away for Easter. I do blame Leonie for making me buy the Nutella in the first place. She said last week I think on her blog how very enjoyable Nutella is, making me realise that I haven't eaten Nutella since I was in Europe well over a year ago now and forcing me to give into Nutella cravings and go and buy a jar and eat said jar.
Pause to insert nutella spoon into mouth, sucking on said spoon until there is not even a smidge of nutella left on spoon. Feel sicker.
I was already having a rather shitty shift at work tonight. I was working a function under the (ahem, cough) supervision (choke on the word) of the young crewleader at work, John of the atrocious treatment of women (the one who told his current sex buddy whom he worked with about his sex life with the nicest girl in the world Frieda) and the kisser of Sharlie (who fell in the river). He never does any work and never has any idea what he's doing (he was a barman who was promoted by two of our previous male supervisors who liked him - never 'worked the floor' on a function in his life, or even spent much time in the kitchen), and relies on the older staff (like me) to basically run his functions for him. Which is fine, because usually I don't have tables in particular to look after, but can run around helping everyone and making sure that things such as coffee are being brewed. Tonight John gave me tables and his little buddy Sharlie (the laziest girl on the face of the planet, I swear) got to be the 'float', which involved her following John around, talking and play fighting with him, having two breaks while most staff had had none, and eating cake while we had run out of coffee and cups and saucers and had 200 people lined up wanting coffee and cups and saucers. I have no problem having tables (it's definately easier than being a float most of the time), it's just that John expected me to do float things too. Like, he and Sharlie hadn't even noticed that we'd run out of cups and coffee (she was eating cake at the time), and when I said "John, you need to get some cups out here" he wanted to know why I couldn't do it. Try: I have 35 people with plates that need clearing and would like some more drinks all in the next 10 minutes, before they have their tables pushed to the side of the room to make a bigger dancefloor. I told him to have Sharlie do it, and walked off. She is so lazy, she just put out the cups and walked off, leaving the next poor busy waitress who passed to go in search of more coffee for the thirsty clients (and it was an AA dinner tonight, so they hit the coffee hard). Stuff like this had gone on ALL NIGHT, with her doing nothing while another couple of experienced staff and I tried to look after our own people and the 'greater good' of the function as a whole.
But this isn't the reason I am eating nutella at now 1.59 am on Easter morning.
Eat some more nutella, licking the end of the spoon where it had fallen into the jar and gotten all sticky with nutella.
Katie (remember her, the girl whose parents sold her car without telling her, and didn't even give her the money?), Frieda (nicest girl in the world, cruelly treated by John) and I were down in the staff canteen on a well-earned break. We were sitting at one end of a long table. Luke, the very ocker barman enters the canteen. Luke is 35 and acts like he's still a 25 year old surfer stud with girls swooning at his feet and his life ahead of him, rather than a 35 year old sexist surfing bloke with greying hair whose black work vest hides an expanding potbelly, while the only job he can get is that of a casual barman. Quite a few of the other girls hate Luke, for his sexist outlook on life and his extreme violent rages he flies into sometimes (possibly caused by a few too many blows to the head by his surfboard and a few too many beers over the years). I have always gotten on quite well with him. He just reminds me of some of my dad's old blokey-bloke mates, those of the 'old school' of Aussie males. Although I was ready to kill him last week when I was trapped all night with him in a small bar, with him blaming me for every mistake he made (it must have been me, as I am the girl who doesn't work in the bar very often, not him, who is near computer-illiterate to the point of not understanding the computerised bar till).
Dip spoon into nutella jar, stick spoon into mouth and suck.
So, Frieda, Katie and I are in the canteen. Luke enters, and stands at the end of the table. Frieda and Katie were sitting opposite each other, closest to Luke's end of the table. I am on the other side of Katie. Placing his hands on the table and leaning down to us, Luke grins like a loon and stands there. We all look at him.
"Now, I don't know what to do. Two attractive girls for me choose between - who will I sit with." We stare at him. Frieda says, "What about Cecilia?"
Luke walks down to our end of the table and squats down. I am closest to him at the end of the table, with an empty seat opposite me, and Katie beside me, and Frieda opposite her. "Now, Cecilia and I have a different relationship to that I have with you two" Luke says to Frieda and Katie. "She's intelligent, and we have a relationship where she talks and I listen." Katie, Frieda and I all look at each other. "So you're calling Frieda and I stupid?" Katie says. "And me ugly?" I say. Luke ignores me (I am after all the ugly one), and speaks to Katie and Frieda. "You two are the kind of women blokes find intimidating, attractive and intelligent." That was all I basically heard. He burbled on some more about how gorgeous Katie and Frieda were, and how Frieda would be not just gorgeous, but sexy if she had long hair, and not just sexy, but the best kind of sexy, 'classy sexy'. I said to Katie and Frieda "I can't handle this", and got up and walked off, chatted to one of the set-up stewards (the guys who set up and dismantle the function rooms for us), then went to the loo, fighting tears on the way. I just couldn't believe that Luke, who I thought I'd always gotten along reasonably well with, thinks of me as just an ugly girl (although a smart one), and dismisses me as basically not as worthy as Katie and Frieda, who are attractive. When I spoke about it later with Katie and Frieda, Katie said "but he didn't call you ugly." 'No, not outright," I said. 'He just said that while you two are attractive and intelligent, I'm intelligent.' And she had nothing to say to that. They didn't even say the usual friend platitudes, like "you are attractive, he's just an idiot". If they had I probably would have cried from the sympathy, but still, they didn't, which makes me think they knew there was no point because I'd see straight through the lie.
And I really hate the use of the word 'attractive'. It's like he's saying no guy will ever find me attractive and I'm doomed to being a lonely old women.
And Bug, if you point out that Mark finds me attractive and would date me at the drop of a hat I will THROTTLE you. I think his liking just grew over the four years we spent in pretty close contact at uni, until during that fourth year when I was the only female friend he was still in regular contact with.
So this has not been a great start to my Easter. I am sad, and I should be eagerly anticipating my Easter breakfast of chocolate softened before the fire.
But still, may everyone else eat themselves sick over this festive time and just enjoy having four consecutive days off work! |
posted by Cecilia @ 1:30 am  |
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| 7 Rantings: |
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didnt you get the memo? 're: are all boys evil?, yes, yes they are'
and...hazelnuts are good for you, therefore, nutella is too..
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Ceci, on the 18 years we have been friends, I SWEAR to you that you ARE attractive. You're pretty. You are ALSO damn intelligent, which you know, but the upshot of that malaka saying all that is that he is JUST an insensitive fuckknuckle!! I don't care how many surfboards have smacked him on the head or how many beer bongs he's chugged, you DON'T treat ANYone like that, that was disgusting. And it was unlovely of those girls not to at least TRY to cheer you up
If I'm not allowed to use Mark as an example (despite his massive crush), may I use Regan? Remember,my bouncer mate from Syrup who had to pick his jaw up off the ground when he met you? HOW much did he go on about how cute you are?
Don't listen to the fuckstick, and DEFINITELY enjoy your Nutella (although Milky Way spread is better) and we'll go out for dinner this week and have a boy bash
Love you, honey, and not JUST because you're pretty xoxo
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Buggy darling I adore you! I'm dying to find out what that f***head you fancy from your work texted you too!
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fuckknuckle and fuckstick....I love it. While I can not comment on the looks thing because I have never seen you, it's still quite rude to tell someone that. I might think something like that but never say it. And the way you describe him, it doesn't sound like he has room to talk.
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wiil one of you write something!! dont you know i have no life??
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(and your sidebar is at the bottom of your page..)
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Monkey, I PLAY WITH PLANTS! I have never pretended to be a computer person! (Oh, and seeing as you don't know me and can't hear my voice this is only mock exasperation!)
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didnt you get the memo? 're: are all boys evil?, yes, yes they are'
and...hazelnuts are good for you, therefore, nutella is too..